6.21.2010

missed last monday, but here's another go-to moment to munch on...

go-to mondays have not exactly gone the way i had planned.  
Which leads me to this question of how to keep on keeping on-
when you have a problem with time management and sticking to a plan. 
I happen to be chief amongst this tribe.  
A few days ago, Noah declared to me in a moment of self-pity over my overextended, full of deadlines life--
"Mom, you need to learn how to say no sometimes."
I've heard of this method of dealing with stress for a long time from grown-up-time-management-gurus, most who just happen to be genetically inclined to enjoy goal-setting and life-planning and then sticking to the plan.  they are usually the ones that enjoy handing out the information that has worked so well for them.  this joy of sticking to stress-relief plans alludes me. 
i know not why except for the fact that i dislike structure and feel cramped by too much planning.  it feels like such an inhibitor to creativity.  but you see, this is one of my flawed critter components, not one of my assets (unless i was the second coming of picasso and was paid to be flamboyantly messy, introspective, and disruptive in order to create some genius work of art. well picasso i am not.  i'm not sure of much, but this fact i'm certain of.)  
So when your 8 year old son says with old soul resoluteness- like "mom, i know the problem, i see you everyday, i know you, so i see the problem better than you do, just listen to me."
Hence, i hear the child.  and the child is right, oh so right.
  But truth be told, I don't know how to say no, when i've only recently, since age 30, learned how to say yes...
yes to life, yes to challenges out of my comfort zone (they are oh so scary, but oh so good to learn to conquer), yes to working hard, yes to trying new things and finally making income, yes to singing or recording or playing music whenever i can, in any capacity i can, yes to writing whenever an opportunity comes up, 
and yes to school even.  even though it is difficult on a level i can't even use words to explain.  
all that to say... now i need to take noah up on his challenge and insight- 
and say yes to saying no sometimes.  
to make and keep making room for the things that matter most- through everything...
family, relationships, down-time (re-boot), connection, not just introspection between this deadline and that. 
So this go-to moment monday is a lesson i've learned from a wise 8 year old.  
the gist of it is this-- if you talk about being overwhelmed and stressed, or complain about being tired all the time, then even in the midst of opportunities
there is a more important opportunity available- personal freedom to say no:
in the moment of 'i can't take anymore, i've reached my limit.'
So logical this theory.  which as it would have it, is the chip i missed when ali brain was being fused together long ago- logic. 
working on developing a makeshift chip. 
til next time, this go-to mom is not the go-to person on keeping on keeping on when the overwhelmed stick hits you upside the head.  but a little red head is the go-to person on it.  
his philosophy-- just say no if you need to. 
keep it simple.  that's what they told me about life in recovery. keep it simple.  
thanks noah for the reminder.

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